solve problems, navigate obstacles, race to the finish line, save the world!
yours, amanda L. at 9:54:00 PM [+]
oh my fucking god. the bionicle website. go now and watch lego robots fight each other. this site completely makes up for the fact that actually playing with bionicles is boring, because you can't make them into anything but what they are. put your toys down and go and watch rad animations instead.
yours, amanda L. at 9:44:00 PM [+]
my body is for real
there is no water in my house. it is the opposite of flooded. everything feels like years and years ago, and i can't talk to anything, just go for walks and try to stay in one piece. the world is potent and multilayered.
yesterday we swam in at the swmming hole at bridal falls and elizabeth bravely jumped from an impossible height but i only climbed overtop rocks like a monkey and jumped from reasonable heights into the cold cold cold water. we took pictures of leaves and stones and the ground and ourselves, looking ultra-beautiful.
i feel crazy
yours, amanda L. at 12:22:00 PM [+]
the photographs i did not take and wanted to turn the car around and drive back when i remembered that i had forgotten
1. the words loves calculus carved into the sidewalk
2. the airplane symbol sign
3. the buses that said ORBIT in their destination screens
yours, amanda L. at 12:11:00 PM [+]
we are hours south of home. the word georgia is green and yellow and black. the word south is also green; green and black and grey. the word green is yellow-green, or maybe lime. i feel strangely lightheaded and delicate (i.e. shatterable) when i think too long about space and distances. this is more pronounced in cars driving fast with people still inside them. little hurdling shuttles. motion and velocity etc.
i remember that distance is real, and i imagine the world in space with us all impossibly attatched to it by gravity and my stomach rolls with fear. and then i imagine my house, and feel panicky because if gravity were to give up i would want to be near my house and the people i love so that i could grab onto them and not fly alone into space.
we are happy in georgia. we swim at the college pool, which is bright bright blue and highly chlorinated. i squeeze my eyes as shut as i can so that the contact lenses in them do not float away accidentally. we eat food not bombs bread and vegan chili for free. we wear beautiful sweaty dresses and find the confrence dull, with too many white punk rock kids our own age. there is a big poster on a wall where people can write the last-minute workshops they have dreamed up, and i suggest we write "swimming workshop" or "swimming at the pool from an activist perspective" on it.
swimming is way fun.
we're leaving athens early to go to a swimming hole one hour north of here.
i am euphoric and volatile, swinging from mood to mood.
we sleep very little, however, which is nice, but not as nice as i had told myself it was.
yours, amanda L. at 2:51:00 PM [+]
on leaving the unloved city
muna and i take the van to hampton, virginia, to collect beth and take her to athens. we listen to songs where boys sing about their emotions.
(i removed a few sentences here on today saturday)
we decide that it is somewhat unfortunate that the boys in real life do not talk and behave like the ones that sing on cds.
i think quietly for awhile about how well nicholas can express emotions, both in songs and real life, and i feel both happy and sad.
we are going to the southern girls' conference in georgia.
yours, amanda L. at 8:54:00 PM [+]
i woke up this morning once, with the feeling that the dream i was
dreaming i had dreamt solidly for seven hours, and the sense that
i had gotten an extra good amount of sleep because i had such a
continuous and fleshed-out dream; it was seven am and i went
back to sleep very happy
when my alarm woke me at eight i was less happy because i did
not feel so complete
in fact, as the day burned into focus, i felt less and less good, and
sort of i-don't-want-to-get-out-of-bed-ish
hey: symbols.com is rad.
yours, amanda L. at 1:56:00 AM [+]
the five of us rolled 600 dollars' worth of sod to cover the northernmost market bay.
it looks like a sculpture project; something jonathan arp would make.
after the sod was all placed, i watered it.
i'm not sure if everyone else thinks it is as hilarious as i do, but trust me, it is hilarious. truth: it is funny to water the grass where only hours before there was asphalt.
i am thinking about camping or picnicking on it tonight.
i want to write and write but i am so sleepy, too sleepy to stay awake, too sleepy to write anything else.
yours, amanda L. at 6:11:00 PM [+]
my eyes are dried out. i am married to the computer. it is an illness. i am wanting rescuing.
all morning, biking around, so much that the back tire is mushy, now. at cary and boulevard there was an amazing car accident where the car was upside down with glass everywhere and the passengers crawling out the windows. when it hit the nearest parked car all of those parked along the road became shoved together, making a zig zag pattern /\/\/\/\/\/\. the EMT's wrapped the people into stretchers with foam neckbraces and a girl in a pink shirt bit her lip and talked to the police and moved her guitar case from her crooked car to her friend's. us on the corners, making up the edges of the spactacle, discussed logistics with arms pointing and swooping.
"the maroon car t-boned the white car and it hit the median and---"
my friend stephen who is in russia no copenhagen does not like to see accidents or violence in films. this accident would make him wince.
yours, amanda L. at 10:28:00 PM [+]
when the day spirals upward and times ten
this morning kelly and i met at eight a.m. to paint the bus
with a strong-smelling, cancerous epoxy. i pause
by the portable stereo saying, hey i have a cd today.
and kelly says, well alright.
i wait a moment and then say, its pop music.
and she says, killer.
i am happy, happy, happy.
yours, amanda L. at 1:19:00 PM [+]
my day has just started
the number 26 computer in hibbs basement finished my webpage urls in the address bar when i typed them. that is spooky.
wandering around vcu campus. i wanted airconditioned computer rooms. just now, i took the elevator upstairs to the second floor where there are huge windows, and across shafer court machines are taking apart a building. inside, where i am, it is very quiet. it seems to make no sense.
on how the contraptions ripped into the concrete and made no sound while they worked.
and lots of it.
yours, amanda L. at 2:30:00 PM [+]
anda gail lewis 2005. stop crying every day.