Tuesday, February 25


new. similarly so.

yours, amanda L. at 12:25:00 AM [+]

Thursday, February 20


Diver Variables:
Inexperience: Positive
Equipment Failure: Negative
Inadequate Equipment: Probable - regulator harness would have prevented
Equipment: Unknown
Health Conditions: None known
Panic: Positive
Solo Dive: Negative

Dive Variables:
Depth: Moderate
Penetration: Negative
Excessive Bottom Time: Negative
Low Air: Negative
Mixed Gas: Negative
Decompression Stop Required: Negative

Physical Variables:
Embolism: Negative
DCS: Negative
Narcosis: Negative
Oxygen Toxicity: Negative
Drowning: Positive

yours, amanda L. at 7:30:00 PM [+]


the answer is richmond

yours, amanda L. at 12:20:00 PM [+]

Wednesday, February 19


pace of travel finally caught up with him in 1972, when he simply collapsed.

the important thing to remember is to only ever fly in airplanes that arrive to their destinations moments before sundown in the winter, somewhere that it has snowed, somewhere that is relatively developed in the sort of way that makes you unhappy to see it on the ground in the daytimes with its subdivisions but from the sky looks like this: circuitboards and veins in your hands and leaves on trees and all the other patterns that make up all things, but only in white and a nice charcoal brown, and you are memorizing it and promising yourself that you will draw only drawings of the way the streets and houses look right at this moment and nothing else for the rest of your life, and the closer the plane gets to the ground the faster the view changes from greybrown shaded areas to minature toy trees and toy trucks and toy houses with orange lights coming out from them lighting up little circles of snow on the ground beneath the windows and its so overwhelming;

the airport was empty except from the gigantic dog, the police and the green line desk, and with the baggage machine stopping and starting with no luggage coming out and everyone together staring hard at it going around and around, otherwise the terminal seemed desolate. it was snowing and snowing. for the first time, i had to go to the desk labelled items to declare with my dahlia bulbs in their yellow see buy fly bag; and i feel lightheaded and giddy from airplanes and time difference and my always-flu.

i have had the flu, in many interesting ways, for a month and a half. i have had the swollen throat and hurts to swallow, the fevers and chills and muscle aches, the throwing up, the lost will to live, the coughing, the angry, the headaches, the earaches and painful process of airplane landings without ears properly unpopping, the all things flu.
and then, yesterday morning i woke up and suddenly had pink eye. pink eye is what kindergardeners get and pass on to one another because they are always wet with drool and sticky with apple juice and clutching each others faces and hair. i got mine by attending a mensa select show and retiring to ryan's house for tea and card games and asleep in the guest bed with its white fluffy comforter.

but then ryan and i did things all day, like a trip to the dmv for new licenses ("can you emphasize my pink eye please?") when i am addicted to getting new license pictures taken and he needed to renew his anyway; he also taught me backgammon, something all of my friends play but no one will ever show me; and we had the usual discussions on the topics of crushes and flirting and objects of affection. when jason laferrera arrived at ipanemas he brought saline solution for my eyeball and a sheet of temporary tattoos of puppies and i pulled out all the herbs i had collected at ellwoods earlier that day onto the table along with a piece of cheesecloth and made a compress with chamomile, eyebright, fennel and calendula. we were drinking pbrs and i dipped the compress into a mug of hot water and held it against my eye and ryan has a new notebook he is excited about writing stories into.

"are you taking blood from my finger?" "no actually we need to take it from the vein...is that going to be a problem for you?" "oh no! i think bloodwork is rad! i just wish i could see it, but i don't have my contact lenses in. you know. because of the pink eye (points to pink eye)." "well. thats---" (does not finish sentence.)
so today i took my first trip to the richmond fan free clinic, which is my new favorite place because it is a place to go when you are sick that is free and i am excited about that. it is rotten to be a hypochondriac, medical fanatic as well as a sickly person in general, and have no health insurance. once college was over, besides the few medical studies and IFV donation i have participated in, all health care stopped completely and my twice monthly trips to the doctors for various real and imagined illnesses became a regiment of vitamins and natural food supplements and finger-crossing.

the fan free clinic gave me medicinal eye drops and speedy pseudoephedrine-based decongestants.
i hope they test my blood and find out i have something excellent, like mono.

okay. talk to you soon, computer

yours, amanda L. at 1:17:00 PM [+]

Friday, February 14



just waiting, waiting for the plane. the next plane. i fly in airplanes and that is what i do, it seems. hey look at this: helicopter.com, the place to buy and sell your helicopter. and here, you can read about how the kids in the group ADULT. do not like to touch things in public. which i think is reasonable. overload media is okay i think.

amsterdam is ultra cold.
i guess its snowy in virginia well i will be there soon enough

yours, amanda L. at 7:32:00 AM [+]

Thursday, February 13


here is this kid's livejournal that he doesn't really write in. and here is his website. i met him in spain. he is travelling around at the expense of the US government, involving himself in sordid love triangles throughout europe. muna found him weirdly alluring, but wisely kept her distance. he has musical tastes that mirror adrian lakey's. if you want to send him trashy AIM messages, i will gladly hand over his screenname.

yours, amanda L. at 2:07:00 PM [+]


ohh, let's make music with computers.

yours, amanda L. at 5:37:00 AM [+]

Monday, February 10


what happens

coffees and the morning when the sun is trying to get inside and the doors all open and around the large table we are listening to the public radio World news streaming through damianīs laptop connected to the speakers. world news. talking about the anti-war stencils they will make. block bush. i am sewing random little things. i have walked all over the place, looking out at the entire city at once, and i have made a friend or two. one is krys from canada, who requested that i mention him here in this webjournal, and insisted that i somehow work in the sentence that he "rocked my world". well, i donīt know about that, but there is the reference.

yours, amanda L. at 9:04:00 AM [+]

Saturday, February 8


(i mean, did you look at those dinosaurs? the ones below?)

oh, the alhambra.
wet grass and trees.
i will cover my next house in mosaic tiles.
i am gravely in debt, it seems.
i wish i could get ahold of rory phillips in london so we could meet and chat in the airport next thursday night. i think that would be rad. i have not seen rory in some years.
want to be sewing and making.
want to be flying around in airplanes. oh, the easyjet. soon soon soon.

at the hostel they make you apple crepes for breakfast.
i started reading gravity's rainbow.

yours, amanda L. at 8:54:00 AM [+]

Friday, February 7


well hello so
so i am in granada in the most amazing hostel ever to be found in the middle of the tangle of streets and caves and maze that is the albayzin. i lurched my bags up the mountain and my bed is next to the window and when i saw the view from the terrace was out across the rio darrio and the alhambra, i leaped up and down a few times and yelled at it. at night it is very cold and in the day the sun warms everything up but the doors and windows stay open at all times anyway and you wrap yourself in blankets and it is as if you are living in your remote mountain cabin except when you go downstairs there are nice people on all the couches and tables and chairs, reading books and playing chess and smoking and getting drunk all night. and a cat that licked creme off my fingertips all morning. there are gigantic plants everywhere including enormous cactus and the streets all curve around and backtrack overtop of each other and everything is just carved out of everything else to make a crazy mess

when i threw my bags on my bed someone had left a copy of new scientist on my bed so i have spent the last twenty four hours reading and talking about CDM (cold dark matter theories are so over) and silicone chips running microfluids through them and all that other hip stuff.

yours, amanda L. at 7:48:00 AM [+]

Wednesday, February 5



ŋso how many people had interesting conversations with strangers that they believed to be munaīs hijazi via AIM?

yours, amanda L. at 12:19:00 PM [+]

Monday, February 3


going for walks and looking at the sliced apart buildings that are crumbling into one another and where the wall paper of each room dividing up the side into little squares and the empty lots have tiled floors but it is outside, at night with the cats and small sounds; i like valencia but then i think i like every where,
and all the kids are looking for apartments and i thought about joining them but i am weak from the world and its decisions and my own volition is like a constantly dividing cell and i always choose: everything. it is pulling me apart. now: i am choosing to rest and go south and then finish up for awhile, retreating. so you know my plans collapsed right? joey rositano and i are not starting a youth hostel in barcelona because joey rositano has good reasons to keep him in tenessee and that is a problem because that is not spain. this leaves me with little reason to stay in spain except for that it is warm and beautiful and interesting. but i am not so rich and i think i want something more than jobs teaching english or other survival techniques. i briefly considered becoming a street performer on a box, a human statue, but this compared with the music and video and designs and art works i could be working on with my friends in virginia, it seemed so less good

i think that might put you up to date.

iīll spend a little while longer in places like cadiz, cordoba and malaga and then it looks like its back across the ocean
oh but who knows. it is all incomprehensible to me.

yours, amanda L. at 11:38:00 AM [+]

Saturday, February 1


i mean, i had a touch of some flu that i am sure resembled port dying of typhoid in north africa, but then somehow i recovered. all i remember is three days of intense dreams, pain and muna imploring me to drink water.

yours, amanda L. at 3:27:00 PM [+]


i was supposed to write about sharks and the beach but instead we fled the city itself.

yours, amanda L. at 3:24:00 PM [+]


i am in valencia. i am in excellent health.

yours, amanda L. at 3:22:00 PM [+]

anda gail lewis 2005. stop crying every day.

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